I Believe
by Lady.Shirenna.Stark
Summary: It's time for the Victory Tour! We last left Siren she was a Victor with a broken heart and a baby on the way. How will she handle the struggles of her first love, pregnancy, and possibly a new attraction on the tour? How will the quarter quell effect her? Read to find out! Sequel to You Kept Me Alive.(read that first to understand)Reviews are always Welcome!
1. Remembering

"Siren!" I hear coming from down stairs. I groan turning to look at my clock... Ugh 6:32am... That could only be one person ,not to mention it's Victory Tour day.

I put my hands to my ever growing belly as I use all my effort to get up. I grab my pink silk robe, recent gift from Caesar,and walk down the stairs to the font door. I wipe some of the fog off the window on the door to see Gainey,Winky and his team standing there in their furs. I know it's winter but come on its the south it's not that cold! I open it letting them in.

"It's about time!" Gainey says rudely.

I roll my eyes at her and shut the door.

"Keep your voices down My family is still sleeping." I say softly as I turn around to face them. Their mouths drop as their eyes zero in on my big belly. Winky's face went from shock to grinning like an idiot as Gainey scoffed.

"How did you let yourself get so fat!?" She sneers.

"Gainey, I have 2 things to tell you... One, I'm pregnant you idiota! Two, Do I have to remind you that I know how to kill and get away with it?! No one would ever realize you're gone.." I say walking past her. I just love getting under her skin.

"F-Finnick would..."her small voice says nervously.

I halt in my steps as I feel the stab of jealousy creep into me. I played it off smirking at her over my shoulder. "Thats what you think." I say and continue walking to the and his team trailing behind me.

I walk in and sit on the bed watching everyone come in. Minus Gainey. " Siren Darling, you look positively radiant with your pregnancy." Winky says as he takes a ton of garment bags out of his trunk and lays them next to me on the bed. He flips his now short white hair out of his face in a huff.

"I may look it but the baby is giving me all kinds of hell." I say sardonically.

"How are you handling the morning sickness?"he asks as he holds up a shirt to me.

I groan "They should call it all day sickness! I swear I felt like I never left the bathroom! Now it's better but I'm just always sleepy,its better than being in the bathroom with your head stuck in the toilet but still."

"Well little one, I will make sure you and your baby look amazing!" Winky says unzipping bag after bag.

I shake my head smiling at him. He hasn't changed one bit. I climb off my bed when the smell of coffee and food reach my nose I leave my room and go down to the kitchen to see my sister Keery cooking and putting a pot of coffee on.

"Oh please say that's decaf?!" I say hopefully, crossing my fingers.

She laughs as she grabs my favorite mug down from the cabinet. I pumped my fist in excitement as I sat down at the table in the bay window breakfast nook. It was my favorite spot to eat in the kitchen. One of the benefits of living in Victors Village is living right on the ocean. This side of my house faced it.

I smile at Keery as she sits down across from me sliding my mug to me. I groan in satisfaction as the hot yummy liquid fills me.

"So how was your trip back to the Capitol?" She asks.

I grin happily and tell her all about it. Originally I was scared that President Snow was going to make my worst fear happen and turn me into a prostitute while I was pregnant. Nope. President Snow knew about my talent that I was working on now that I didn't have to work. Someone tipped him off that I could sing and play. He had me perform in his home for him and his granddaughter. I chose to sing the song the song that I could remember was the last one I remember singing in the Capitol. The one Finnick walked in on. They applauded me and Snow told me he wanted me to sing a few songs on the Victory Tour in a few select Districts and that he wants me to do a concert at the end at the Presidential Palace. I was a nervous wreck when he said that. I barely was able to perform for my family and friends let alone crowds of people. He seemed almost desperate for me to say yes like he was depending on me doing this for some reason. I reluctantly agreed but that wasn't the end of my trip.

President Snow accompanied me to a Doctor's appointment for the baby. They had all kinds of gadgets they used. It was crazy to see pictures of my baby from inside my stomach.. I didn't know they had things like this. The whole way to the train station when I was leaving President Snow was telling me how much he was happy to have me as a Victor. He told me how much I was loved by the Capitol and how I was exactly what Winky made me out to be. Panem's Sweetheart. My name giving way to the nickname The Sultry Siren of the Capitol. He was being unusually nice, automatically my guards went up. He was up to something I just didn't know what.

As I finished telling my sister of my trip she looks behind me into the den.

"What?" I ask turning around to see Gainey in the den looking at the pictures of my family and friends on the mantle. I tilted my head in curiosity. Something was definitely on her mind, did I want to be the one she had a heart to heart with? Hell no! But I am not as heartless as I try to be to her. I can see her tears reflecting in the fire light as a becon calling out to someone anyone to talk to. I groan at myself for having any kind of sympathy toward her as I stand to walk into the den to see her pick up a picture running her gaudy finger nails down the frame. It's a picture of Finnick and I. I was twelve he was fourteen. I smiled at the memory. I was trying to surprise him by jumping on his back but he caught me turning his head to the side to smile at me as I laughed. Mags snapped the picture without us knowing.

"That was the spring before his games."I say .

She turns and looks at me sadly then back to the picture as she places it back on the mantle.

"You really have been in love with him for a long time ,haven't you?" She whispers with more tears coming to her eyes.

I sigh."Gainey, I don't think you're the one I should be talking to about how long I've been in love with your boyfriend." I whisper sadly.

She smiles ruefully." You're all he talks about you know? Siren used to tell me this, Siren that, this is her favorite food, this is her favorite color...he never stops"

I don't know what compelled me to but I put my hand on her shoulder as she cries. She surprises me by turning and latching onto me. I stood awkwardly patting her back as she wailed. She mumbles something into my shoulder but I can't hear it.

"What?" I say confused.

She leans back as she takes a deep breath. "I wish with all my might that he would look at me the way he does when he even thinks about you"

I look down at her my mouth just hanging open. I had no clue what to say to her. I knew Finnick was with her for some grand scheme Snow has but he still betrayed me. It doesn't change what he did during the Games. He was not only my boyfriend but my mentor. He should have been there for me but he wasn't. And the woman currently attached to me made sure of that. Apparently the baby knew that too and began kicking furiously.

"Woah!" Gainey says in shock letting me go.

Thank God!

"What was that? Was that the baby?!" She asks

I put my hand on my stomach as the baby kicks again. I nod to her.

"Yup, she either really likes you or can't stand you." I say laughing.

"She?!" I hear from behind me. I turn to see my family and Winky's team plus Mags.

I nod smiling."Yup I'm having a girl!"

Next thing I know I'm engulfed by everyone laughing, crying, and smiling. I felt so loved. I remember my father's reaction when I finally returned home after my big reveal after the Games. The memory still as vivid as yesterday.

* * *

(Starting from where she leaves Finnick)

I turn and leave the room and take the stairs down to the lobby where Winky and the rest of everyone was waiting stood.

"Oh no..." Winky says sadly when he sees me."Netofa fix her make up now please."

The assistant that was always silent came up, I remember the first time I met her. She was the first person of the Capitol I met when I arrived. Yellow hair, purple skin, still the same. As she finished fixing my make up the cars arrived.

"You want to ride with me?" Katniss says.

I look over to see her and Cinna walking by. Katniss stops and gives me a small smile holding her arms out the me. I walk up and hug her tightly.

"Mia Sorella sempre non importa cosa!" I whisper pulling away wrapping my arm around her waist as we turn to walk outside.

"What does that mean?" She asks placing her arm around my shoulders.

"My Sister, always, no matter what." Cinnas voice sounds before I could.

"Si parla la lingua del distretto di quattro?" I ask him.(you speak the language of district four)

"I speak many languages Miss Leeds." He says smiling softly down at me.

I smirked up at Kat. "Your stylist is awesome!"

She giggled, "I know." We both laugh as we enter the car.

Right before the door closes I see Finnick and Gainey step outside. Sadness creeps into my heart. I know now I can't have Finnick in my life. Not even as a friend. When you love someone like I love Finnick, you can't just be their friend. My heart doesn't work that way.

The conversation to the stadium was light and fairly happy. Katniss had told Cinnas of my pregnancy. He told me it couldn't be any better because now that gives him an excuse to make maternity clothes. I told him he didn't have to do that but he insisted. Katniss tells me how her reunion with Peeta is going to be on stage before I come out. Truthfully I'm excited to see Peeta, he really is an amazing guy. Katniss is lucky to have someone like him love her. Someone willing to sacrifice everything to be with her.

The car stops and immediately the nerves hit me. I take a few deep breaths to calm myself and get out of the car and wait for Katniss. The roar of the crowd can be heard from outside already.

"Wow..."I say breathlessly.

"They are excited to see their Victors!" Cinna says walking ahead of us.

"Ready?" Katniss says hooking her arm through mine.

"Ready to tell the world I'm pregnant with my rapists baby.. Hell no... "I pause looking at her. "Ready to get this over and go home? Oh yea."

She smiles. "Then let's go!"

We are immediately rushed in and brought to a room under the stage. Kat will go before me so she and Peeta can have their moment. They place Katniss on some sort of metal plate and I hear the crowd roar as Kats team is called out. Suddenly her plate rises to the stage. After a few seconds the sound is deafening ,I can only guess they are kissing, I laugh sadly to myself. It's when I'm pushed onto my own plate I hear my teams names called out. I fluff my hair out and adjust my dress plastering on a fake smile as the plate begins to rise it feels as if it's vibrating under the roars of the crowd.

Blinding lights, I blink rapidly and suddenly a flash of the arena hits me but it's quickly replaced by the crowd. I smile and wave as I turn to see Katniss and Peeta standing clapping for me. I walk as quickly as I can in these shoes without falling and embrace both Katniss and Peeta around the neck. The crowd goes insane! We stand there holding onto one another for a few minutes ,the crowd continuing to go wild. We break apart and I sit next to Katniss as she hugs herself up to Peeta.

Caesar tells a few jokes and then it's time for the show. I feel Katniss tense beside me. I grab her hand for reassurance. We both aren't prepared for this. I'm not ready to see my brother die, my rape, Rue... Thresh... Everyone..I take a deep breath to try to calm myself. Caesar hears me and for some reason holds his hand out to me I grip it tightly needing the comfort and support.

The type of story they choose to tell seems to be one of a Love story and one of survival. I open my eyes to see myself and my brother in the chariots. Instantly the tears spring to my eyes and I tighten my grip on Katniss and Ceaser. My nerves begin to get the best of me as the show goes on. They show my move with the whip and the knife, the fire, the tracker jacker nest, then the part I was dreading the most. My brothers death and my rape.

I close my eyes tightly and as soon as I hear my brothers cry my eyes snap open and a sob escapes my lips at the sight.I let go of Katniss and Ceaser to cover my mouth. They show everything, when Cato kills firenze and my scream is heard I hear people crying in the audience I begin to sob on stage my stomach starts to turn. I look up and see Cato begin his assault on me. My stomach turns again. Whether it's the baby or not I know I'm about to vomit. I launch out of my seat run to the side of the stage where my team was ,Caeser following me. My eyes scanned for a trash bin, I ran to it just in time as all my stomachs contents came out.

"Siren are you ok?" I hear Ceaser behind me ask.

I nod holding my finger up. Once I finished I sit down and someone hands me a bottle of water and a hand towel. I wipe my mouth and take a few swallows of water.

"Ceaser.. I'm fine, that was just a bit much for me but I do believe I have an announcement to make after the show." I say as he helps me stand.

"You're announcing it here?!" Finnick says incredulously.

I turn a empty stare to him " President Snow ordered me to."

Winky steps up to fix my makeup and I turn once he's done and walk with Ceaser back on the stage, just as it shows me dancing on top of the horn. Everyone begins to laugh and starts chanting "Do the dance" and so I it was quite difficult to do in these shoes. I laughed as I sat down.

Once the show is over, the interview begins. Ceaser starts with Katniss and Peeta. He talks about Peeta's "Love at first sight" and much more till he gets to what Katniss was thinking about with the berries. Uh oh.

"I don't know... I just.. I couldn't bare the thought of being without him, or Siren. She's family to me. She took care of me in the arena." She says grabbing my hand.

"Speaking of young Siren. What were your thoughts when she pulled out the berries.?" he asks

" I was so ready to die at that point that I could only think of being able to be with my mom and my brother. I made my choice but I told myself if I were to go out anyway I'd want to be with my family." I say looking at Katniss and Peeta.

"Family seems to be something that means a lot to you. " he says.

I nod." Yes, I have a lot of little brothers and sisters. And when I was young and my mom passed away I had to grow up fast and step into her role. I know the value of family. I know to hold onto it while I can."

"Speaking of fast. You jetted off the stage pretty fast." He says laughing looking out to the crowd.

"Yea, that was hard to see plus my hormones being out of wack." I say sheepishly. Here goes nothing.

"Hormones? What do you mean?"

I take a deep breath. "Well..." I pause looking into the crowd and see President Snow, he nods." It seems I'm going to be a mom soon"

There were shouts and gasps and even more cheers. It was out now. Everyone knew, including my family...

* * *

"What is everyone blubbering about down here, the cameras will be here in two hours! Siren gets your pregnant bum up here now."I hear Winky yell from upstairs.

I look around at everyone wide eyed as we all burst out laughing. I left the room and went upstairs. I sat in the chair Winky set up as he grabbed a bunch of different garments and pushed them into my arms. The top was a flowy pale blue chiffon top that accentuated my baby bump,a pair of dark denim maternity jeans with dark grey suede knee boots (thank goodness they were low heels) and a long silver satin flowy sweater. Without skipping a beat Winky sat me back down in the chair once I was dressed and begins to pull my now all black curls back into a half up half down do and natural looking makeup(for once) This outfit , everything , is the most like myself I've felt the entire time I've had him as a stylist.

I didn't even get a chance to glance at the mirror before he starts ushering me out and down the stairs.

"Ok people its ten minutes till Showtime!" Gainey says loudly.

I take a deep breath calming myself,this is the first time Panem would see me since the Games and I would be big and pregnant. I walk into the parlor room and I'm my eyes meet with someone I haven't seen or spoken to since the Games.

* * *

Once the interviews were over the anthem played as President Snow took the stage with three people with pillows behind him. He walks up to me first grabs a silver crown and places it on my head.

" Congratulations my dear, you deserve this." He whispers to me.

"Thank you Mr. President" I say in a small voice.

When he was done giving Kat and Peeta their crowns the anthem sounds again as we walk off the stage.

"Can we go home now?"I ask everyone tiredness evident in my voice.

Finnick walks up to me, immediately my blood turns cold and all I do is want to hit him and hit him hard. He steps back when he looks into my eyes. "Yes we can go home." He says.

"Not to be rude Finnick but I don't want to be anywhere near your right now."I say coldly.

"But Siren..."he pleads sadness clear in his sea green eyes.

"But nothing.."I pause seeing everyone including President Snow and Ceaser watching us intently." I was close to death, almost killed by mutations and all I could do was think about you. Yet I come back to find everything we had was a lie , everything I thought was from you in there was from Mags when all along you were with her!" I scream pointing to Gainey.

"Hey!" She protests.

I give her a murderous look "Shut the Fuck up you ugly Ass Barbie wannabe and get the he'll away from me!"

I look back to Finnick."You may have kept me alive in there but now.. I live for my child and myself. Don't talk to me,don't look for me ,don't even think about me. Forget I exist!"

* * *

I shake my head at the thought and walk past him, ignoring him as I sat down in the chair set up in front of the camera. I try my hardest not to look at him but I can feel the burn of his eyes on me. My baby girl kicks me again, I close my eyes as I rub my stomach. My nerves are going insane. I need to calm down. I keep chanting to myself. "Interview, train, sleep. Interview,train,sleep." The light on the camera turns on... Here we go.

* * *

I'm back! How did you like this?! Review and let me know! I know it's starting slow but trust me this one is going to better than the first! Btw Happy 4th of July everyone! Btw, my birthday is in like 2 weeks lol I can't believe I'm going to be 26 o_O I'm old lol nahhhhh.

Btw, Disclaimer... I own nothing but my OC's.

**Review Follow Favorite!**


	2. District Eleven

"Here we are with one of this year's Victors ,The Sultry Siren of The Capitol. Siren Leeds.!"

I hear Caesars voice through the speaker on the underside of the camera. I smile brightly and wave to the camera.

"Look at you! You're glowing! Tell me how are you doing my dear?"

"I'm doing great just taking care of myself ,the baby and working on my music." I say softly patting my stomach.

"If anything you look even more beautiful in your pregnancy darling! Now what's this about your music? When will we be hearing it?"

I lean forward a bit like I'm acting as if I don't want anyone to hear. "You can keep a secret right Caesar?" I whisper smiling.

He laughs and says. "Siren darling you know me!"

I wink at the camera, "Exactly! So it'll be a surprise for all but a few select people."

"Awwww always a mystery you are! Well you take care of yourself and that baby! We'll see you on the Victory Tour my dear."

I smile and blow a kiss to the camera and wave. The lights on the camera go off and it's done.

"Ok, we have fifteen minutes to get to the train station to be able to meet the others in District Eleven. So let's load up and go! Chop chop people!" Gainy shouts to everyone.

I halt getting up as I raise my eyebrows at her smiling. She looks at me as she blushes and shrugs."I take my job seriously...when I want to."

I shake my head laughing at her as I walk by her, that girl is something else. I walk outside and sit in the cars they have for us. I shut the door and roll down the window as my dad walks up.

"You be careful and take care of yourself and that baby. Ok sweetheart." His deep voice sounds.

I smile up at him nodding.

"Oh, I almost forgot..."he pulls some sort of silver necklace, no it's a locket ,out of his pocket. "Someone brought this to me when y'all came back yesterday. The jeweler in town just got done with it."

I reach out taking it from him. I recognize the center diamond immediately. My mouth hangs open in shock.

"Was this made with mom's wedding ring?" I ask my voice low and thick with emotion.

He nods. I rub the face of the locket with my finger tips. It's a heart shaped silver jewel encrusted locket. The center stone is the diamond from my moms ring. The other colored jewels I recognize as mine and my siblings birthstones. Only it seems one stone was missing.

"Wait, what's this spot empty for?" I ask him showing the missing stone

He smiles proudly at me. "That's for the baby when she's born"

I stare in shock. I open the locket to see the inside. My hands start shaking. It's one of Firenze and I on one side and a picture of my mom on the other. I couldn't hold the tears in. I open the car door and stumble to get out and wrap my arms around my dad's middle. I hug him to me as tightly as I could.

"Thank you so much papa." I mumble into his shirt.

He rubbed my back gently as he whispers. "You're welcome but this wasn't my idea sugar, I can't think of stuff like that. I could barely pick out that pearl necklace your mom wanted. I'm just a fisherman." He laughs.

I pull back and look up at him confused. He nods his head behind me. I follow his glance and see Finnick leaning against the car watching us. He gives me a small smile that doesnt quite reach his eyes. I never really looked at Finnick since the Games. His normal bronze shining hair has lost its luster. His shining eyes no longer shined only dull and lost looking now. He had bags under his eyes and it looks as if he hasn't been shaving very often. It was clear he was hurting.

I turn my eyes to see Gainey watching us. A sad expression on her pointy face. Was it just me or was everyone always sad lately? Me, Gainey, Finnick! Who else do I need to add?!

I take a deep breath, my insides churning and my heart hammering in my chest. I walk to him, he stands up pushing himself away from the car an anxious look on his face. I stop right in front of him keeping my gaze on the locket held in my hand.

"Did you do this?" I ask barely above a whisper. This is the first time I've spoken to him in months.

"Siren , I just..." I cut him off.

I lift my head my eyes locking with his. That feeling I always got stirs inside me. I do my best to push it down.

"Did you do this for me?" I ask my unsteady voice giving me away.

His eyes search mine and it takes all my will power to not break my resolve and kiss him. Finnick will always be a weakness for me.

"Yes, I did. I figured you would want something special to remember your brother and your mom." He says softly, taking a step closer to me. He was inches from me now.

You could feel the tension like electricity between us. I look back down to the locket closing it in my hand as more tears fill my eyes. Damn my emotional hormones, Damn you to hell! A part of me breaks a huge lump forms in my throat.

"Thank you Finn." I whisper as my voice cracks.

I surprise myself when I wrap my arms around his middle. His arms circle me gently as if he's holding me... He is.

"I'd do anything for you Si." He whispers to me kissing my hair on the top of my head.

I close my eyes a moment to savor this feeling. I've ached and longed for this but I was too angry to allow it to happen. I'm still angry. I clear my throat and pull away wiping my cheeks as I turn to get back into my car. I don't turn back I know if I do I'll break completely. My heart hurts even more now. Despite how my heart feels when he's sweet and does things for me and holds me. It doesn't change what he's done to me.

I hug my dad before I get back into the car. The driver takes off to the train station as I put the locket on. I yawn as the car stops and we get onto the train.

"Gainey wake me when we get close, I'm going to go get some sleep." I say walking through the the furniture not waiting for a reply.

The door to my room opens and I take my boots off when I sit down not bothering to cover up or anything. I just lay on top of the mountain of pillows before sleep takes me.

I wake to Mags shaking my shoulder slightly. I smile stretching and get up to check myself. Winky is going to die. My hair is a mess it was sticking up in all odd places. I laugh at the expression I can picture on his face and run my fingers in my hair making it worse. Mags smiles brightly at me as she shakes her head. Hey I may be a Victor and a mom to be but I am still a teenager and I like to have fun every now and then. I was happy, I had a dreamless sleep for once, so I was in a Good mood.

I walk out the room behind Mags with a small smirk on my face. I walk to the car where I hear everyone at and slowly peak my head around the corner. Finnick is the first to see me before he spews his drink everywhere and busts out laughing. Gainey scoffs and is about to scold him when he points to me. Her and everyone else looks. I'm busted. I step out from behind the corner and Winky gives a loud shriek and he's on my hair before I know it mumbling furiously to himself. I do my best not to laugh but everyone is laughing or giggling, it's contagious. I blink in suprise when we enter a tunnel. I feel Winky step away with a sigh of relief. He must have fixed it. I walk to the window in the car and immediately my heart sinks. The wall we just went through had to be atleast one hundred yards thick and atleast 30 stories high. Not to mention the razor wire on top. This was Rue and Thresh's home. My heart goes into panic as I see the watchtowers. Gargantuan Men holding assault rifles. The harsh grey a stark contrast to the wildflowers, the crops, the orchards growing within its walls. Rue had told me how difficult it was here.. Not once did I think it would be this bad.

My eyes search the horizon. District Eleven is monstrous in comparison to Four. I remember in school the books described it as "large" yea right...

I turn my head as I feel the train slow. Everyone is watching me. I feel the baby moving sharply. I close my eyes to calm myself. Something isn't right, something bad is going to happen I can feel it.

"Something is going to happen, something bad. I don't know if I can sing today." I say warily, wringing my hands together.

Finnick walks up as the train stops he takes my hands in his. I grip them in fear biting my lip in my efforts to calm the shaking in them.

"Siren...everything is going to be ok, come on let's go."

I nod the sinking feeling not easing at all. Funny how one look at something can make a good mood go bad instantly.

There was no one on the platform, just peacekeepers. We were ushered from the train and into a big black armored truck. Oh how inviting.

I pull Finnick to my side in the truck. He was my safety net despite how I felt I know I can barely speak to him right now but I'm scared. He rubs my back the whole time Gainey talks. I don't hear anything she says. I finally hear her when she starts snapping her fingers in my face. I blink in surprise.

"Did you hear me?" She asks.

"Sorry Gainey...what was it?"I say still half distracted.

"What I said was you'll be up first in your speech and your performance. District Twelve will go then the party that evening. In and out quick then back into the train to District Ten."

I nod as the truck stops. I get Finnick and a peacekeepers to help me down out of the truck. I wipe my brow, I didn't realize that District Eleven was this warm, warmer than back home. I shrug off the sweater and hand it to Winky.

We 're hurried inside where Kat and Peeta are waiting with their teams. Kats head pops up when I walk in as a smile graces her tan skin. Peeta as well.

"Siren!"she calls walking briskly to me. Suddenly a look of panic flashes in her face. Her arms wrap around me. she kisses my cheek and puts her lips to my ear. "We need to talk after this." I nod to her. This must be serious ,the look in her eyes tells me something is wrong.

"Siren! You look beautiful!" Peeta says as he embraces me. I kiss his cheek and hug him back. Peeta reminds me of a younger version of my father, just way smaller.

"Thanks Peeta."I smile at him.

He rubs my baby bump."How's the baby?"

A real smile comes to me. "Shes great, giving me fits but she's healthy in there."

"She?"Katniss asks softly.

I nod but before we get a chance to finish talking, the mayor can be heard announcing us.

"Big smiles!"Effie says and nudges us forward as the massive doors open.

I see the huge crowd in the town square. The two stages with both families of the tributes and Rue and Thresh's pictures on screens behind them.

The applause dies out as the Mayor gives his speech. It's my turn once he's done. I step to the Mic staring at both Rue and Thresh on the screens.

"Being here is particularly hard for me. Both Rue and Thresh saved me at some point. They weren't just another tribute in the Games to me. They were my friends. Rue reminded me so much of my little brother. They even helped each other in the training center..."I pause as someone brings me a handkerchief. I look at her family" She taught him how to climb ,he taught her how to tie knots." My voice begins to crack horribly as I let the tears flow freely." She sat with me as I mourned, she listened to me when no one else was there. She stood by me when she didn't have to. She helped both Katniss ,Peeta and I in so many ways. I will forever be grateful and love her." I pause again to try to suppress the sobs. My whole body shaking. I look to Thresh's family."Now Thresh saved my life. He was a great man. I say man because he wasn't a boy. He sacrificed himself to save me. He put himself in harm's way to ensure I could get away in time. He gave me the very shot of medicine I needed to save my life."I paused again with a small laugh." He could tell I was scared of needles and he did it for me. He helped nurse me, he could have killed me instead he saved me as a favor to Rue. Because of my devotion to her. For that is a debt I can never fully repay. I can however embody them in a memory of them in a song I wrote. It says a lot of who they were as people. I wrote this song about two months after the Games. If y'all would like, I have Permission from President Snow to sing this. It's called "I'll Stand By You"

I wipe all the tears from my face as I go grab the guitar waiting for me with a pair of guys one with a bass and a violin. I put the guitar on as best I could and walked to the Mic.

"Playing this thing used to be easier when I wasn't 6months pregnant." I say. The crowd laughs lightly.

I close my eyes as I begin taping my foot and start the song.

_Oh, why you look so sad?_

_the Tears are in your eyes_

_Come on and come to me now_

_Don't be ashamed to cry_

_Let me see you through_

_'Cause I've seen the dark side too_

_When the night falls on you_

_You don't know what to do_

_Nothing you confess_

_Could make me love you less_

_I'll stand by you_

_I'll stand by you_

_I won't let nobody hurt you_

_I'll stand by you_

The tears fall again as I sing and play. It's hard to keep my voice even but the more and more emotion I put into it the more the tears came

So, if you're mad, get mad!

_Don't hold it all inside_

_Come on and talk to me now_

_Hey, what you got to hide?_

_I get angry too_

_Well I'm a lot like you_

_When you're standing at the crossroads_

_And don't know which path to choose_

_Let me come along_

_'Cause even if you're wrong_

_I'll stand by you_

_I'll stand by you_

_I won't let nobody hurt you_

_I'll stand by you_

I open my eyes to sing the last bit to the families_._

_Take me in into your darkest hour_

_And I'll never desert you_

_I'll stand by you_

_And when, when the night falls on you baby_

_You're feeling all alone_

_You won't be on your own_

_I'll stand by you_

_I'll stand by you_

_I won't let nobody hurt you_

_I'll stand by you_

_Take me in into your darkest hour_

_And I'll never desert you_

_I'll stand by you_

_Oh, I'll stand by you_

_I'll stand by you_

When I finish the last chord everyone applauds. I bow slightly. I look up to the sky and bring my hand up to my heart and circle it. I look back to the crowd."Thank you! I just want to personally send a special Thanks to President Snow and the Capitol for letting me be able to share my music with you. This was truly an honor."

I wave and blow a kiss to the crowd, giving the guitar back to the guys off stage. I turn to stand where Katniss and Peeta are. Kat grabs my hand tightly turning to look at me. Tears in her gray eyes.

"That was beautiful." She whispers.

I give her hand a squeeze as she and Peeta walk to the mic. Peeta speaks so eloquently. He talks about how rue and Thresh each helped keep Katniss alive, therefore keeping him alive. He hesitates a moment before he says.

"If can no way replace your losses but as a token of our thanks to the tributes families of District Eleven we'd like you to receive one months of our winning every year for the rest of our lives."

I cover my mouth in shock. I knew Peeta was generous but I didn't think something like this was allowed... Hell I'm positive it's not. Katniss kisses him and the Mayor comes up to us to present us all with a plaque. We say Thank you and turn to leave , only for Kat to stop.

"Wait!" She calls."Wait please"

We all stop to watch her. She steps up to the mic. I cast a curious glance to Peeta when he shrugs I turn my attention to her.

"I want to give my Thanks to the tributes of District Eleven. I only ever spoke to Thresh one time. Just long enough for him to spare my life. I didn't know him but I always respected him. Even more so now that I know what he did for Siren. He played the Games on his terms. I respected him for that." She pauses. It's eerily silent. "But I feel as if I did know Rue. She'll always be with me and with Siren. Everything beautiful brings her to mind. I see her in the flowers that grow by my house , in a mockingjays song, in Sirens song she just sang. But most of all I see her in my little sister Prim. Thank you for your Children and thank you for the bread."

What happens next is no accident. The notes, the melody Rue showed us when we were in the Games, is sounded. One by one you see people bring their fingers to their lips and hold out three fingers. My heart swells yet the nagging feeling from earlier comes back with a vengeance. Something is happening. That was Katniss last goodbye to Rue .

I look at Katniss and see nothing but Fear. Pure unadulterated fear.

Suddenly we are all pushed back into the justice building. I watch her say something to Peeta and leave the open doors, I move to follow her. I wish I hadn't.

That sense of dread quickly fills me when I see a pair of peacekeepers dragging the old man who whistled Rue's tune to the top of the steps. Shoving him to his knees in front of everyone.

"No!" I scream.

I feel a pair of arms encircle me. The strong smell of alcohol envelopes me. Haymitch.

I watch horrified as another scream rips through me as I hear the gun go off and the sight of the bullet going through the old man's head.

I knew something bad was going to happen... I knew it!

* * *

How was your 4th? I did nothing but writing lol So how'd you like it?! Just a quick glimpse to see the emotional state Siren is in. A tiny bit of Finnick/Siren fluff.

Please if you read, review it only takes a few seconds and I really love hearing what my readers think. it means so much to me.

I ONLY own the ocs song credit is I'll Stand By You by Carrie Underwood.

Thanks


	3. NOTE

I AM SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SORRY! i haven't been able to actually update in so long but i am in the works with getting some more chapters written down. Life has really gotten to me lately and i haven't had time to do anything. but do not fear! there will be an update with the week! thank you to all my faithful readers and reviewers! you're my life source with this.

Thanks,

Lady Shirenna


	4. The Baby

My insides churned. I hadn't experienced this type of sickness since I saw my stint of the games. Chaos... everywhere.. I had no idea what to think all i knew was Haymitch had his arms around me and My feet just went with him.

Shock

Awe

disbelief

All i could see in my head as we ascended the stairs was the man falling to the ground...Dead.

We reached this dusty room apparently Haymitch knew of this place from his many travels after he became a victor.

Haymitch tries to calm Kat down, She's hysterical. He couldnt do it. So i shook myself off and stepped in front of her and slapped her.

she jerked her head back to me eyes blazing.

"I'm the pregnant one, why am i not hysterical and you are? What the fuck is going on?" I whisper tersly.

Katniss begins to explain how President Snow showed up at her house, how we are all in danger, even outside the arena. Our friends , our family.

" Me? How am I in danger?" i whispered angrily again.

Katniss looks at me " He believes there is an uprising going on in the districts, he thinks us doing what we did, what I did, he thinks it was the reason the districts are starting to rebel. I was supposed to try to calm things down."

My eyes went wide. I walked numbly to the dust covered chair and sat down with tears in my eyes, my chest rising and falling, close to hyperventilating. This honestly can't be happening. I'm pregnant what more could Snow want to do with me? My life was ruined because of these games...

"This has to stop. Right now. This – this – game you two play, where you tell each other secrets but keep them from us like We're too inconsequential or stupid or weak to handle them. Siren may be pregnant but she's one of the strongest people I know."Peeta says heatedly.

Katniss and Haymitch look at one another guilty. Haymitch begins to talk about how he had to choose one of them in the arena. He chose Katniss.

The look on Peeta's face was heartbreak. He was hurt and rightfully so. He nodded to them and stormed out the room.

I still looked on in shock, still no idea what I had done to cause more grief and heartache to my family. I didn't pull out those Berries.. Katniss did... I wanted to die... i was going to die...

Anger began to course though me like liquid fire. My glossy eyes turned toward Kat and Hatmitch. Haymitch was the first to see my face.

" Now, Now.. Siren.. remember that you're pregnant... " he said with his hand in front of him stepping in front of Katniss.

I didn't care, i looked past him and saw her. Her grey eyes red and teary and scared.

I launched myself at her screaming."This is all you're fault! A man just died because of you! My family is in danger now because of you!"

Haymitch caught me in the air and sat me back down. I began to sob into his shirt.

He turned to her telling her to go get ready for the dinner so that she can try to fix this. I heard her footsteps as she walked away, my sobs still echoing the room.

"Why Haymitch?! I wanted to die in there! I didn't want all this! I was ready to die! My family doesn't deserve all this!" I sobbed beating my hands into his chest.

"Listen sweetheart, Snow is a monster, if you had be the only victor your life would be worse off than this. Katniss is his focus right now, you just calm yourself , focus on this baby and focus on being the darling of the Capitol, ok?" he whispered holding my face.

I nodded trying to calm myself.

"Now go see your team to get dressed for the dinner, I think Cinna has something for you to wear" He says helping me up out the chair.

I nodded and wiped my face walking out the room. As I decended the stairs I came face to face with Finnick and Gainey.

" What happened? I heard you yelling all the way down here." He whispered concerned.

I looked at his handsome face and my heart starts to break again. I'm so conflicted, I want to run to his arms and cry as i know he would comfort me. But i'm still so angry at him for betraying me.

I just look at him as I pass him to walk towards the team.

"Winky, I was told Cinna had something for me to wear to the dinner tonight?" i whispered to him. Not trusting my voice to not shake at full level.

He smiled and nodded as ushered me into a room that had everything there for me to get ready. I sat in the chair as he did his work. My hair was swept up all to the top of my head in intricate waves and curls having some tenderils hanging down with my bangs. My make up was very contoured and natural looking. The dress was incredible. Cinna had outdone himself. The dress was a nude shade but had lace covering the entire thing. It hugged my baby bump in a pretty way and scooped down revealing my entire back. The length went down to my knees. I stood up and put on some black patent pumps to compliment the red and black lace. I was ready.

The dinner went great. I dance a little bit, had some interesting food. I had a very good time till I started to get cramps in my legs. Damn these shoes.

I sat in one of the chairs in the room as I watched the people. I happened to put my gaze on Finnick and Gainey who were dancing happily together. Either Finnick was doing his normal " Make everyone think im happy bit" or he actually was. It was so hard to tell now. I longed to be in his arms. I hate my pride, I hated what he did to me more.

The Victory tour went on and on. Katniss stuck to the cards Effie gave her and I stood behind them and sang when I was asked. District 2 was particularly hard... Cato... His family looked at me and my stomach. I had their relative in there.

I found out what was so costly to me, Snow had threatened my child if things didn't go as planned with Katniss. Said that He would personally see to it that My child is taken from me and given to Cato's family to be raised as he was.

I now had reason to hate Snow. Hate everything he was even more. I know if he ever laid a hand on me and my child, he would have Hell to pay and not from Katniss, but me!

I woke up one morning to find my sheets completely soaked and my stomach starting to hurt. I looked on the calendar on the train... my due date was only a week away and we were heading to the capitol for the final trip.

I immediately knew what was happening... my stomach immediately contracted in the worse way possible.. The scream that met my own ears frightened me. I heard footsteps running to the door.

Finnick was the first in. Without a word he picked me up and brought me to his room and put pillows behind me. Mags sat next to me holding my hand motioning for me to breath a certain way. I was scared out of my mind. I wanted my mother so badly. I wanted this pain to stop.

"MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP!" i screamed.

Finnick grabbed my face as i screamed . " Siren, you have got to calm down, control your breathing, and relax, this baby is coming now and you have to keep your wits about you...

The baby was seriously coming... oh fuck me..

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

SOORRRRYYYY!

I literally have been all over and had so much happen! I've had another child and moved all over! i finally have time to update! hope you like it!

Thanks to those who have reviewed!


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